Dear Weather,
I love you right now. The cool nights and dew kissed mornings are about all that keep me going. That fantastic lightning show on Sunday? Totally awesome. However....whatever pollen or mold you bring with you is horrid. Please make it go away. I'm sick of the uncontrollable cough at the most inappropriate times, runny nose that makes me resemble a crack head and voice that sounds like Janis Joplin. Okay, maybe I could keep the voice.
Adoringly, snot-filled yours,
Kristi
Dear Disney channel On Demand,
Please. Pretty please. For the love of my sanity, please allow more than the same four episodes of Little Einstein's and Imagination Movers on the On Demand channel. The prince knows them by heart. It was adorable for a moment. I'm now speaking in rhymes, dreaming in symphonies and oh hell.....it's killing me!
On Playback,
Kristi, the ever attentive mother
Dear Fall line-up on television, including football,
Curses! When do you expect me to get anything done with all these new shows?? Not to mention my old time favorites are always playing in the fall. Did you not get that memo about NaNoWriMo? Let me explain it again: 50,000 words in 30 days=no television, eating or sleeping. And your cable companies charge too much for DVR.
Hopelessly Addicted and now Anxiety Ridden,
Kristi
Dear Children,
Keep it up and you know what's going to happen......
The evil mother
Showing posts with label letters to life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label letters to life. Show all posts
Friday, September 17, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
Letters to Life
Dear Laundry,
Please stop multiplying. I don't recall having all of these clothes to begin with. Also, if you could just hang yourself up, my life would be so much easier.
Piled Under,
Kristi
Dear School Staff,
Why is it necessary to have breakfast so early? My children are going to starve if this keeps up!
Under Slept,
Kristi
Dear Fellow Drivers on the roads of TN,
GET OFF MY A$$! err... Bumper
Highly irritated,
Kristi
Dear WIP,
I miss you, truly I do. Could you just skip that garden scene? I know it's important, but we could find something else, right? I'm not really great at all this research while so much else is going on. If you could just magically write it yourself, that would be even better!
Missing You,
Kristi
Please stop multiplying. I don't recall having all of these clothes to begin with. Also, if you could just hang yourself up, my life would be so much easier.
Piled Under,
Kristi
Dear School Staff,
Why is it necessary to have breakfast so early? My children are going to starve if this keeps up!
Under Slept,
Kristi
Dear Fellow Drivers on the roads of TN,
GET OFF MY A$$! err... Bumper
Highly irritated,
Kristi
Dear WIP,
I miss you, truly I do. Could you just skip that garden scene? I know it's important, but we could find something else, right? I'm not really great at all this research while so much else is going on. If you could just magically write it yourself, that would be even better!
Missing You,
Kristi
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