So to follow up on my previous blog about the discovery of this new phenomena I've been experiencing; I'm writing today about my lack of a complete solution. However, it's also an acceptance of my situation that helps me out a lot.
First of all; there are certain truths we hold to be uhm..truths. The kids/husband/plumber/electrician/internet service/brand new episode of some favorite show/the need for food will all inevitably interrupt your writing time. Accept it. Love it. Live it. Learn it.
In my situation; the Court Jester has a degenerate hip disease which causes him much pain. Therefore, his load is a *tiny* bit lighter. Full time Dad is no easy load.
There is a lot more to a disability than the physical aspect. His disease also creates a lot of mental and emotional distress. He gets tired of sitting at home and therefore when I'm home from work, he really enjoys having another adult to talk with. *conflict* I have so damn much to do when I'm home from work that sometimes he ends up feeling a tad left out. So then when I think about sitting down to write...I feel a tad bit guilty.
SOLUTION: Re-communication. We both fell out of our routines and neither of us really talked about my writing much anymore...bills, kids, bills, work, kids, bills is about what was happening. When we talked I found out that during the Prince's naptime he would really love to go out to his garage and piddle around. It's a short amount of time and with the weather slightly warming, it's a little less painful. So we agreed-he will go and piddle; I will write. If he doesn't go out; I will still write. On my days off, I have two hours allotted to me of guilt free writing time.
Next conflict: I had lost all self-discipline in finding those stolen moments and grasping onto them with both hands on the keyboard. I think the solution there is simple enough. This is why I'm writing this blog post at 1:50 in the morning. I haven't quite wound down from my night at work. Instead of watching TV...I'm blogging. I might only write one sentence. Two words. But I will be writing when the rest of the house is sleeping. This is only solved with self-discipline. This will be the hardest part of this process of weaning myself back into writing again.
But I'm glad to be more conscious of why I had such a hard time writing for more than a few minutes at a time without losing all concentration. It's not really them. It's me.